Monday, October 13, 2008

True Confessions: I am a Dallas Cowboys Fan

It all started when I married my husband and realized how much he really watched ESPN. If he were writing this blog he would argue about how much I watch the Food Network. But there's only one Food Network competing with at least 4 different ESPN channels on cable television! And then there is Fox Sports, NFL Network, Fox, NBC, CBS, ABC, and on and on.

In order to combat this necessary evil that invaded my house shortly after my wedding, I decided I had better get used to watching at least some sports with him. Little did I know that I would soon be yelling at the TV and urging players to score touchdowns.

There's just something about the sound of helmets clashing, the suspense of a 50+ yard field goal, and those darn football pants that got me hooked. Why the Cowboys? Well, I used to live in Dallas and the Texans just aren't that promising (sorry Houstonians). I'm also a pretty big fan of the Colts and the Giants because what's not to love about two brothers who are starting quarterbacks in the NFL AND back-to-back super Bowl winners? 2007 and 2008 were good years for the Manning family.

NFL football is a weekend event in my house and I'll admit that I look forward to watching the games throughout the week. I've even watched an entire Monday night football game when Aaron was out of town! Shh, don't tell.

Ladies, don't worry, I still ask questions like, "Do you think Jason Garrett is married? What about Jason Witten?" or "Why does that player wear his hair like that?" (I wikipedia all of this and more during halftime.)

I have learned a lot of the rules and lingo of NFL football but I still have to ask, "What does 'lining up shotgun' mean?" or "Offsides? What is that?"

Now that I have asserted my Cowboys fan status, can we talk about what happened during Sunday's game? Did they actually think they were going to win like that? They sucked it up. Royally. We pay previously mentioned Asst. Head Coach/Offensive Coordinator Jason Garrett waay too much. Hey Jerry [Jones, Cowboys team owner], why don't you just pay me that much to tell Marion Barber to run on EVERY first down? It's getting a little obvious and I'm pretty sure the opposing team is on to you Jason Garrett.

Or maybe quarerback Tony Romo (9) is just a wuss and doesn't feel like throwing the ball on first down. How 'bout we take some risks once in a while and play out of the box. What if we actually try to throw the ball downfield and not just dump it to Barber so he can shuffle for half a yard then fall down. Tell me why exactly we are paying Terrell Owens (81) if he isn't going to catch the ball and run like hell to the endzone?
And Jason Witten (82), what happened to you? A couple dropped passes and unable to get open? We can always count on you to come through! Get your head back in the game! Please!

And don't even get me started on Jessica Simpson. Every game she has come to and been on camera, Tony has managed to lose. I have yet to see her this season but I'm pretty sure she's getting into his head because he's still managing to LOSE. We had a golden opportunity in overtime (thank you Nick Folk (kicker) for making that 52-yard field goal to get us to OT even though you jacked that other field goal in the second quarter) but Romo squandered it away in a quick 55 second possession. Who exactly told him it was okay to get on the field and go 3 downs and out in SUDDEN DEATH OVERTIME? That would be Jason Garrett. Again.

And now, Tony has announced that he's broken his pinkie finger. Ok, I know that finger is probably essential to throwing a football but doesn't that sound like the wimpiest injury you've ever heard of?Sigh. As you can see, I'm getting worked up about this. But NFL football plays with your emotions! One minute it's a last ditch field goal attempt to get us into overtime (YAY!) the next minute, the opposition has blocked our punt attempt, broken our punter's foot, and scored a touchdown (CRUD, or another expletive that's bouncing around my head but I won't write here).

Cowboys, I'm still with ya for the duration of the season but our backup quarterback prospects are bleak. Brad Johnson (14), 40 years-old and coming off a 2 year stint on the bench, I'll be praying for you. I hope Tony's back soon.

Roger, over and out. Time to watch Eli Manning and the NY Giants defeat the Cleveland Browns. (Unless they play like the Cowboys, wink).

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